When we’re in a relationship, we all like to go on romantic dates, talk about almost everything with our partner, and live a life together. However, there is a clear difference between being dependent and being overly dependent on your partner. So in this article, I’ll show you the signs you are too dependent on your partner.
Relying too heavily on your lover can be harmful to you and it is a red flag for your relationship in the long run. If you’re not sure whether your relationship is on the right track, there are some things to look for.
Here are ten warning signs that you have become too dependent on your partner.
1. You left your interests to do what your partner likes
When you are in an unequal partnership, you stop doing things you used to enjoy. Instead, you’ve adopted all of your partner’s interests in order to spend as much time as possible with him or her. This isn’t good.
You need time to do the things you’ve always wanted to do. After all, you chose those activities because they piqued your interest. Giving up your hobbies for your partner is the surest way to become dissatisfied in a relationship.
A healthy relationship allows you to follow your interests and passion. If you are unable to do so, this is a red flag.
2. You are afraid of being left
In a relationship, the thought of losing the other person is unavoidable, but how much emphasis is placed on this possibility varies.
If the thought of your partner leaving you causes you to panic, you may be overly dependent on them. The same is true if you happen to run into your partner’s ex. It can cause a lot of anxiety because you can’t stop thinking about your partner and them together.
As a result, you may find yourself exerting maximum effort to avoid falling behind. You may be spending way too much money on expensive gifts, dinners, or paying bills to be as perfect a partner as possible and make it as difficult as possible for your partner to leave you.
This is a common problem at the beginning of a relationship when there is a lot of uncertainty and you do not know where you are for each other. Most often it is about one’s own insecurity and one’s thoughts about oneself more than the partner. You do not feel confirmed and you do not get what you want.
3. You are extremely jealous and overinterpret
One of the ways you depend on your partner is that you become suspicious and jealous when your partner tells you about a nice new coworker or is invited to a party without you. You become enraged that your partner is meeting someone else, and everyone around you becomes a potential threat to your relationship.
It is never acceptable to use violence, threats of violence, sexual violence, or jealousy to control who you meet, what you look like, or where you go. Then you should close your ears and flee.
4. You blame yourself when your partner leaves
Your partner is attending a business conference or traveling with his family.
If the thought of this causes you to panic and believe that it is something personal and that your partner would rather leave you than be with you, this is a warning sign.
When you are not together, you immediately feel sad and unworthy of your partner’s love. It’s a warning sign. You need to learn how to stop being dependent in a relationship.
5. You place your partner’s needs before yours
This is one of the ways you depend on your partner. Being empathetic and caring for your partner’s needs is essential in a relationship. It’s also important to keep in mind that a relationship is a two-way street. If you are the only one who goes out of your way to please your partner and they do not reciprocate, your relationship is unhealthy.
6. You require a lot of validation
If you’re someone who gets hurt and sad whenever your partner does not compliment your clothes or ask how you feel in the morning, and you interpret this as meaning that you will be left behind. Or you demand gifts and evidence of intimacy and go insane if your partner fails to meet your standards. Then it is obvious you are too dependent on your partner.
7. You dislike spending time with your friends and family
You purposefully avoid making plans with your friends and family in order to spend more time with your lover. If not, you only spend time with your friends and family when your partner is away. You’re gradually losing touch with your friends, which is wreaking havoc on your social life.
8. You agree with everything your partner says
Even if you don’t necessarily agree, you remain silent so as not to argue with him. However, if you do this on a regular basis, you will lose your voice.
You are a human being with feelings, opinions, and points of view, and you should not be afraid to express them! If you always agree with your partner, you’re letting them decide what you should and shouldn’t believe, which is neither healthy nor safe. You require a sense of self as well as room to grow.
9. You need your partner’s approval for everything
It is not necessary to seek your partner’s approval for simple decisions such as what shampoo to purchase, what trends to follow, or what color nail polish to wear. Have your own opinion and make your own decision!
You should be able to make your own plans without approval or input when you are in an equal partnership. It is unhealthy to constantly seek your boyfriend’s or girlfriend’s approval because you will gradually lose your autonomy. Make your own choices!
10. You count on your partner to fix your problems
Do you always turn to your partner for entertainment when you’re bored? You rely on your partner to stay up all night quizzing you when you have a test. You rely on your partner to feed you if you are hungry. When you’re down, you rely on your partner to cheer you up.
Sometimes you have to deal with and overcome certain aspects of your life on your own. Of course, your partner is someone you can rely on, but you shouldn’t put all of your trust in them. They shouldn’t have to take care of everything in your life. Come to think of it: they also have issues to deal with and solve on their own. You can and should do certain things on your own.
Now, you’ve seen the signs you are too dependent on your partner. If one or more of the above signs apply to you, it is a clear red flag for both yourself and your relationship. The first thing you can do is take some time off and reflect on what is causing you to rely so heavily on your partner.
Once you’ve identified your behavioral patterns and the possible causes, look for ways to reclaim your independence. That’s how to stop being dependent in a relationship.
Remember, it is only when you are happy from within that you can have a truly healthy relationship. And others (including your partner) are simply an extension of that happy state.